Several years ago, I purchased a small farm in Pennsylvania to raise horses. I primarily focused on the Old Morgan breed. I bought the farm at a great price. This was due in part because the previous owner had neglected it. The weeds had taken over the pastures. The barn needed significant renovation. I enjoyed the challenge, but I had to learn a lot about pasture management. I had a bumper crop of weeds, so I had to figure out how to get rid of them.
I attended a pasture management workshop hosted by Penn State Cooperative Extension. What I learned surprised and delighted me. I could get rid of most weeds by over-seeding. I could almost stop the use of toxic weed killer if done consistently.
Sowing healthy pasture seed in mid-March would enable me to take advantage of the freeze-thaw cycle. It would give the seeds good penetration in the soil. This would also increase their germination rate. The healthy seeds would take root before the weeds. Thus choking out the weeds ability to grow. Moreover, if I would over-seed consistently every year, I would end up with a healthy pasture. This would be beneficial to both the horses and the property value.
Relationship Renovation & Restoration
The principle of over-seeding also works in the process of restoring healthy intimacy in our relationships. Old unhealthy thinking, feelings, and habits are like weeds. They will keep coming back unless we begin to replace them with new healthy thoughts, feelings, and habits. Intentionally and consistently sowing new thoughts and understanding will positively influence our feelings and actions.
One of the best ways to consistently sow healthy thoughts (seeds) is with a daily meditation or devotional. It’s even better if you journal the thoughts and feelings you had from your daily reading. It doesn’t need to take a lot amount of time. However, you need to do it consistently and intentionally. Moreover, you need to focus on a specific area of relational growth.
Many good daily meditations or devotionals focus on specific topics. Topic range from relationships, spiritual intimacy, intellectual intimacy, character, forgiveness, and emotional intelligence to name a few.
Your beliefs play a crucial part in the healthy intimacy restoration process. Find a daily meditation or devotional that aligns with your beliefs. This will significantly improve and strengthen the learning and growing process. You will also develop your intellectual, emotional, and spiritual intimacy skills in the process.
Sowing Seeds 365 Days a Year
Take your time to find a great daily meditation or devotional that speaks to both your hopes and heart. There are thousands of great daily meditations or devotionals from which to choose. The key is to find one that will work for you.
Begin your day by reading inspirational, educational, or encouraging new information. Focus on content that adds to what you are learning, processing, and applying in your relationships.
To make it more meaningful, I recommend that you also journal your thoughts about what you’ve read. Focus on the portion of the reading that stood out to you that day. Journal your thoughts or meditation about what you’ve learned.
It doesn’t matter whether you use a daily meditation or devotional. Here’s the key. You are not going to get rid of your unhealthy old thoughts and habits by just trying to stop doing them. You need to intentionally replace them with great, healthy thoughts, feelings, and habits. You have to plant them in your head and heart daily. If you do this every day for a year, it will amaze you how many of your beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and actions have changed for the better.
I hope today’s blog has encouraged you. Make sure you sign up to receive blogs posted every Tuesday and Thursday. TransformingFamilies.org resources are designed to guide you through the restoration process of developing your heart, mind, and strength, enabling you to become the man God created you to be.
I also provide one-on-one coaching, if you want to improve your relationships, let’s connect through e-mail at ‘firstname.lastname@example.org’. My hope for you is that through these blogs, references, and resources, God will transform you from being bruised or broken to an abundantly blessed man.